Thursday, June 12, 2008

A B H M

As I was being Super Woman outside this morning, (tamping down our tilled dirt around the patio, dispersing grass seed, mowing, bagging grass to sprinkle on top of grass seed, mulching around yard plantings, hand trimming around peonies and shrubs, and watering, as well as moving Large Rocks) I was listening to one of my old recordings of Frank Sinatra on my iPod. I have a lot of Frank's recordings where you can hear the band talking in the background, so as I was listening to the saxophones and trombones trading fours, I could hear talking during the sax parts, and thought, man, that trombone section sure is talkative. I finally looked up and saw one of the Blue Hairs standing in front of me. (One of our very angry old neighbors.) She was holding a cover to a grill. It was round. As I finally looked up to see her and removed my ear buds, she said, "Well, you don't listen very well, do you?" I bit my tongue and smiled. She said, "Is this your grill cover?" I said, "No, it doesn't look like it, but let's see if it's someone else's." So, I looked over at our neighbors' decks and said, "Well, I see Jerry and Lori have a rectangular grill, and.." She interrupted me and said, "Well, THIS one is ROUND." I said, "Yes, I am aware of that...that's why I'm checking the shape of the neighbors' grills." She finally crumpled it up in a ball and said, "Well, here, you might as well keep it and see if you can find a use for it." Grrrr! As she walked away, I realized I have never even met her, they never even introduced themselves after we moved in, and they live two houses away from us. I have been telling my mom repeatedly about the Angry Blue Haired Mafia in Pipestone, but she never believes me. They are an angry lot. They are the same people that want all the modern conveniences the town has to offer, but vote no on the school levy...not realizing that once the school closes, there will be no grocery store or cafe for them to drive horribly to and then park over the lines and rush in front of the rest of us in line. Some of my best friends have been what I would consider Old People, but the ABHM crew here in Pipestone seem to go out of their way to be mean to anyone under 82. I don't see the point in being so angry and rude. As she strutted away out of my yard, I wanted to yell, "I was listening to Frank Sinatra, you old coot, so leave me alone!" Ha! Not sure she would have cared. I am well aware we will all be old someday, and can say with certainty that some of the most fun I've ever had was in the company of my great uncle Fred, whom I considered one of my lifelong best friends. I am respectful to elders and feel a lot can be learned from them...most of the time. I will say I've never met a meaner lot of seniors than I have in the goings and doings about this town. Perhaps it has a lot to do with the fact that I am home during the day and try to run all of my errands before Mas comes home, so I am thrust into the pulsing vein of their daily society. Whatever the case, I am thinking more and more about building that 10 foot fence around the yard, neighbors' views of the sunset be damned!

2 comments:

Jamie said...

OMG! The Angry Blue Haired Mafia... you are hysterical. We have a sect of them here in Cali too! Whhoooo-wweeee! I know a place for the crumpled up thing, she should have kept it. It might have adjusted her attitude. HA

Monroegirl said...

True that! I thought of saying choice words to her, but thought better of it...now, I'm wishing I had! Too funny!